Sunday, February 7, 2010

Gods and Balls

There is this theory regarding the evolution of the external balls in some species of mammals.

From wikipedia: "cooler temperature of the testes allows for more efficient fertile spermatogenesis. In other words, there are no possible enzymes operating at normal core body temperature that are as efficient as the ones evolved,....."

so it is all about enzymes that work more efficiently at lower temperatures. this entire argument is about god not being human. So if a human god created universe, mankind and the rest of creation,

1. if he has balls on the outside like the rest of humans, wont he get sterile by the constant exposure to cosmic radiation in the heavens?

from the Genesis" "So God created man in the image of himself" which means he must have balls on the outside like the rest of mankind. so did he got sterile from the dangerous cosmic radiation?

there is one possible explanation,from the Genesis "And God finished on the seventh day the work that he had been doing.", did he go sterile from the cosmic rays after creating the sun and the stars ? Did he put his hands up and rest as he has gone sterile?

2. God might be a woman, they are shielded inside? wonder why the bible or any holy book never mentions of a woman creator? wonder what the PMT of the creator would be, that would be hell over here in earth every cycle? plus there is the risk of menopause.

3. God cannot be human, instead it is just a fish who just walked itself onto the earth, this explains everything including whales, rhinos and elephants having their testicles inside. Fish does not need to worry about the cosmic radiation effecting sperm quality, nor does it need to walk around showing whose got the biggest balls

Sunday, January 17, 2010

How it all began part 1

Every religion should have a creation story.

1. In the beginning, God was around, having a huge paint brush was drawing stuff
2. one day he got bored and created the sea.
3. the second day, he created a boat and went into the sea. just kidding, he walks on water and walks inside it
4. the third day he created fish 1-1 and fish 2. They did not have eyes, but it wont matter because fish can find other fish even without eyes
5. the fourth day he created eyes for fish 1-1 and fish 2, so with that flash of a second he created the sun and the moon, the dots in the sky. of course they could have been there always, but he created eyes which can see them. but it wont mater to this story because fish cannot come outside and see the sun, moon and the stars. not yet
6. the fifth day he created some land and an apple tree. he told the fish not to eat the apples, it wont matter to this story because fish cannot climb trees and eat them. there is no gravity yet, so apples cannot fall onto the land. everything is being held at this point by some glue and cello tape. there is also no snake in our story because it took quite some time for something as complex as a snake, let alone a talking snake or a snake which communicates with a fish evolved. we can substitute the fish with a lamprey. but who cares anyway. so long story short, the fish stayed in the ocean, dumb and happy without the tree of knowledge. fish god was happy. so he blessed them with abundant supply of food pellets and fish sticks.
7. the sixth day, god found reason and put logic, reason, order and disorder into the rest of his creation.
8. the seventh day he got a mop and was removing the evidence of super glue which he found illogical somehow
9. the eighth day, god was fed up with cleaning the universe thus creating an army of bio degradable soft shell robots who will eat up all the super glue.
10. the ninth day god taught the fish some evolution tricks and world domination strategies including how to use DNA switches, DNA regulation and Protein coding. He also taught the secrets of universe and how to become immortal . but fish forget all of this when he turned the other way
11. The tenth day, He made the world self sufficient and tried to teach the fish the important stuff of day 10 again. He promised great heaven and pools of virgin fish to those who remember this stuff
12. he spent the next 3 weeks trying to coach the fish of the same concepts
13. Day 32, fed up with dumb fish. he created the concept of DNA mutation and death hoping that the next generation will be smarter.
14. Day 33, he had to recreate fish 1-1 as fish 2 ate him. since god had 32 days of experience now, the recreated fish 1-2 was obviously smarter and innovative. Fish 1-2 called himself male (which means the smarter fish which obviously uses the intelligence to court the fish 2) and the fish 2-1 was there after called as (female which in the ancient language means the dumber fish which will eat you if you are not smart). God also created Designer clothing in the form of scales and makeup to distract fish 2-1. God also prophesied that fish 1-2 shall work hard and pay for taking fish 2-1 out for dinner.
15 Day 34, all its superior intelligence logic and reason turned fish 1-2 atheist. god had to create hell and send fish 1-2 there. Fish 1-3 was recreated again by god using Fish 2-1 cartilage as template.
16. Day 35, god had to send Fish 1-3 to hell as it turned into gay fish. Fish 1-3 to looking at designer scales and doing makeup instead of repopulating the earth. new fish 1-4 was created from some mud
17. Day 36, god saw fish 1-4 beating fish 2-1. since Wife beating was not considered as a sin rather as a means of exerting control. god rewarded fish 1-4 with a BMW which of course sank and rewarded the fish 2-1 the mechanism to produce eggs
18. Day 37, fish 2-1 gave birth to a new spool of eggs and they are fish 1-5,fish 1-6 and so on.
19. Day 38, god realized there is a lot of boredom in teaching old fish new tricks, so he created various marine life including oysters to produce pearls for fish 2-x and oyster meat for fish love.
20. Day 39, God saw fish 8-29 molesting little fish and thus given domain over the first fish church. the 8 series was considered the priest class and was known to predict the future and molest little fish.
21. day 40 god noticed a bunch of fish worshiping a scifi fish and his cult of aliens from a far way planet xxxenu, so he gave them a church of smutentology to teach other fish the truth in exchange for fish cash and make fish porn. he also gave the fish a patent for EEEMEEETER
22. day 41 , a fish was seen reading the gospel with a bunch of gold plates and thus given control of the church of morons
23. Day 49, a bunch of lung fish in desert are seen converging around the first fish pervert (who sleeps with dead fish), they called themselves Church of dead sand.
24. day 75, a bunch of black bearded fish proclaimed themselves free from the slavery of building massive pyramidal coral reefs over the coast of Egypt. they are following an energetic young red scaled sword fish with white beard who is in constant communication with god. god even parted the sea to kill the fish chasing him and his flock
25. Day 76, the young energetic sword fish with white beard(YESFWWB) went into the mountains of coral to ask god the truth and brought back something written on a piece of crab shell. when he returned back, he found his flock in a huge party with sharks. YESFWWB got mad, crashed the party and banished the sharks into the ocean. Thus the phrase "dont take a young sword fish to a party" originated. Those Sharks to this day remember this humiliation and as a part of ritualistic honor killing hunt fish, jelly fish and seals

more to come in the future

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Commandments about Reproduction

1. Thou shall not sleep with fish, dead or alive.(just because a fish is dead does not mean you have to sleep with it to relieve its sadness). thou shall not also commit adultery with fossils
2. If thou ignore first commandment and do it anyway, thou Shall be known as the revered pervert prophet( not to be confused with sons of god, author prophets who write things up and just plain fish who are born out of virgin fish birth in the sea with the northern light shining in the sky)
3. Thou shall not covet for whales and walruses who are not fish but pretend like one.
4. Thou shall not attempt sleeping with sharks even if you are the revered pervert prophet( If done anyway, thou shall sue the shark for damages)
5. Thou shall not covet neighborhood fish even if such fish were divorced in the past
6. If you remain faithful to the cause and the fish religion, the fish heaven promises 72,000 fish eyed virgin fish school after you die. If you run out of them, you can go to the market and buy more.(there are plenty of fish in the sea )
7. Thou shall love Angel fish equally as a clown fish, thou shall have extend the same feeling for all species of fish
8. Thou shall be considered a heretic and banished to the beaten by fellows with a fish in a sock if you try to question the commandments
9. Thou are a moron if you believe this, why does a fish care about how you reproduce? If evolution is correct, all they want you is dead. more resources and less mouths to feed. The fish god does not have time or the money to keep you in 24/7 surveillance
10. One last commandment, Oysters increase sex drive? But where are the oyster nymphomaniacs

Tetrapods are older than we previously thought

A new article in nature magazine shows that tetrapods might have existed more than 20 million years than previously thought. The evidence points to tetrapod footprints dating around 395 million years. It sheds some interesting facts about evolution of tetrapods from fish.

First this transition might have happened at at different times. this clearly shows that if given conditions are right, evolution from one state to another can happen easily.

Secondly this transition can occur in different places if the intial conditions are right, it clearly shows that creatures are just like machines. The basics are quite simple.

links to the original paper and some videos:

Friday, January 8, 2010


"The coelacanths, which are related to
lungfishes and tetrapods, were believed to have been extinct since the end of the Cretaceous period. They were considered the "missing link" between the fish and the tetrapods until the first Latimeria specimen was found off the east coast of South Africa, off the Chalumna River in 1938."


Original discovery is credited to:

The following is a NOVA Documentary 'Ancient Creature of the Deep' aired on January 21st 2003. Thanks to youtuber 'trilo5219' for uploading it.

Home page:

Thursday, January 7, 2010

The link between fish and Humans


The Sarcopterygii ( is a class of fish which grew limbs and evolved into amphibians

The Tiktaalik ( is an intermediate form between Fish and amphibians

Descendants of the Amphibians later evolved into Aminotes ( which split up into Synapids(mammals) and Sauropsids(reptiles and birds)

Some Commandments of the religion of fish

1. Cults and closed mindedness are not acceptable. The first fish left the sea not accepting the general group think of that time. They are rebel fish that favored evolution over saturation
2. The first fish did not walk on water. It swam in it.
3. Miracles can happen if you give a fish and evolution 50 million years.
4. The fish gods did not originate in the middle east but could have occurred in different corners of the world having shallow water
5. Thou can eat any fish raw or cooked as long as it is eatable. Nothing is sacred in the religion of fish. By eating the fish, you are eating the body of our lord and thus redeemed of your sins
6. Thou shall not turn towards east, west, south, south, bottom and top to pray. Thou can pray in any water, super market freezer or Sunday fish markets.
7. The fish God accepts Evolution and will accept anyone into the fraternity with a good idea towards the evolution.
8. The fish God defined the Heaven as Progress and evolution and Hell as the sea of ignorance and saturation
9. This work and religion is created by a human who is not high. As far as science understanding goes, there is no language in fish and lack the thumbs and fingers to have produced this work.
10. Nobel fish god does not spy on your everyday activities. If it does, it wont commit genocide for your misactions. Everyone is forgiven for their sins.
11. There are no fixed number of Commandments in the religion of fish. The Commandments of the religion of fish evolves with the better understanding of fish and science.